Homework

Please choose any three items from this list of awesome shit and compose a 5,000 word essay to be delivered in slam poetry form via Youtube.  The top five entries will then have a chili-eating-contest runoff, and the winner will be chosen to explain to James Inhofe where babies come from.

• Baseball
• Yo-yos
• Kurt Vonnegut
• Orange juice
• Boston Legal
• Luigi Pirandello
• Tenor saxophone
• Pat Benatar
  
• Andrew Cuomo
• Microfiber
• Mr. Show with Bob and David
• Rhona Mitra
  
• Bicycles
• The Boondocks
• Exile on Main St.
• John Turturo
• Superman
• Dark coffee roasts
• James Wilson